“The English Summer”. Two weeks of the year where all English people are so on edge about the fear of impending rain that we have to talk constantly about the sun to make it seem like it is really happening.
Now we are having a hot spell in May. Crazy, I know. But no less crazy than how we act when the sun is out.
Here is a presentation of a normal sensible English Man. No stereotypes inserted, of course:
And this, this is what happens when the sun comes out.
1) English Man sees that sun is no longer behind grey clouds. Rips all clothes off in one single motion and dusts off the flip flops.
2) English Man then calls his Mam about the sun, talks to his neighbour about how sunny it is, reads in the paper that it is well sunny and then uploads photos of himself with bevvy in hand to facebook telling everyone how sunny it is.
3) Even though it is only 20c outside, English Man is sweating profusely and has already partially blinded passers by with his pale, pale chest.
4) English Man has to go to work in an office. He complains about his to an extreme point and believes that it is a human rights violation to be inside when it is sunny in England.
5) English Man decides that he is king of the BBQ and insists that even though it takes him two hours to cook a sausage, it tastes better than when it was cooked in the normal oven.
I hope you too are embracing the weather. If you have any more things that you do when it’s sunny, comment below.