This morning I woke up with an anger unknown to most sensible human beings.
It was intense and has not been relieved all day. And that is because there is no way of removing the thing which has caused me such great sorrow. Because, dear readers, it’s the weather.
Snow, in late March (yes I know, please do not get me started) has decided to rock up and spray its white shit all over my crib, my car; even my cat if it stands still for more than twenty seconds.
And you know what? I’m taking a stand.
I refuse to enjoy this snow. This snow will hold no magic or wonder for me.
This snow will not pressurise me with its softness to sit in it and make angelic shapes.
This snow will not cause me to spend hours battling with the elements to make a snowman which looks nothing like an actual human being.
This snow will not be ‘pretty, lovely’ or ‘just super!’
This snow will be disgusting, annoying and plain pointless.
So, with that, all I have left to say is:
Fuck you snow, fuck you.